[Exiles Members] Your March Newsletter!

[The Lunatic Fringe]

Upcoming Events, News, and More!


** The Exiles Presents
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March
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mailto:fringe_editor at theexiles.org Email Us (mailto:fringe_editor at theexiles.org)
Upcoming in March
This Month
Officer Elections, Kinky Swap, and a Party

There will be something for everyone at this March's Program, which consists of three parts.  First there will be elections for our elected positions: Co-coordinator, Treasurer, Recorder, Membership Officer, and Sergeant-at-Arms.  Then we transform into our first ever Kinky Swap! And finally, following our regular program, it's time for an after-party until 2am!


Officer Elections
Ballots will be emailed out to members, and a mail-in alternative will be provided, but if you are a member and would like to vote in person, come to our program on the 15th to vote!  Click here for the online form.
Vote Online Here (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=76001aa07f&e=816c1f81b3)

Kinky Swap
>From people with lots to swap or sell, to people who don't yet own anything but might want to buy or be gifted something...we'll have it all.  If  you've got kinky items you want to get rid of, come trade or sell them at our Kinky Swap.  Clothes, Toys, Boots, Gear, Etc...bring it all!  One area will have items to swap for free--drop what you want or take what you want.  A second area will be an organized barter area, putting you in more control of your special items (tags provided for the price).  Are you a small business with something to sell?  Come display your goods for us with other vendors!  Email info at theexiles.org (mailto:info at theexiles.org?subject=Vending%20at%20the%20Kinky%20Swap) .


After-Party
Stay for the After-Party and find an excuse to play with those new toys, wear that new gear, or just have a kinky good time!  $20 with program entry or $25 without.

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RSVP to Our March Program! (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=441714182c&e=816c1f81b3)
Take a Look at Last Month's Minutes (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=07040b98eb&e=816c1f81b3)
-Our Upcoming Events-
Munch
March 6th, 6:30pm-7:30pm
@ Cactus Taqueria, Oakland (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=dd42b89dc1&e=816c1f81b3)

Business Meeting
March 10th, 3:00pm-5:00pm
@ (Location TBD; email cocos at theexiles (mailto:cocos at theexiles) for info)
Program
March 15th, 7:30pm-2:00am
@ Catalyst, San Francisco (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=b3eb337b61&e=816c1f81b3)
Orientation
April 7th, 2:00pm-4:00pm
@ (Oakstop, Oakland) (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=0811950ab1&e=816c1f81b3)
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Learn More! (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=ab17636b25&e=816c1f81b3)
-Women's Community-
These groups and events may welcome more than women, but have a strong focus on women, and we hope that you will check them out.

Groups
Hitchin' Bitches March Events (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=9b0b60ab20&e=816c1f81b3)
Cardea Society March Discussion Groups (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=b7f2f0948b&e=816c1f81b3))
San Francisco Girls of Leather Events (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=93fe517c83&e=816c1f81b3)
Events
Mystique - March 23rd (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=b14438e6d2&e=816c1f81b3))
Femme Fatale - May 11th (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=c3a6bf5e51&e=816c1f81b3))
Crush - May 25th (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=affff0bcba&e=816c1f81b3))
The Women's Calendar (https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=1d3ba0f0c5&e=816c1f81b3)
News and Articles
News
"Bobbee becomes Ms. SF Leather 2019"
February 9, 2019
"I am an Oregon native and moved to Portland, OR when I was 17.  I had been kicked out by my Mormon Family for being gay and lived at a youth homeless shelter until I was 21.  I moved to San Francisco in 2007 and became involved in marriage equality activism.  After the passage of Prop 8 (California's anti-same-sex-marriage ruling), I got involved in a direct action/civil disobedience group.  I have been arrested five times in three states for civil disobedience while fighting for Queer Liberation.

"For 8 years I volunteered for a LGBTQ Mormon Organization on their National Leadership Team. I joined the AIDS/LifeCycle as a volunteer ‘Roadie’ and the 2019 ride will be my 4th year volunteering on the ride. I am currently SF Sober Kinkster 2019 for Bay Area Sober in Leather (BASIL) as well as the co-chair for the group. I also currently serve as a board member for Positive Pedalers, a non-profit group that is focused on “Eliminating stigma through our positive public example”
News
"Piercing Guild Wins Best New Organization"
March 1, 2019
At the 2019 Leather Community Awards The Piercing Guild, founded by our own Ms. Cat and Erin, won "Best New Organization!"
News
"Allison Boots becomes Ms. SF Bootblack 2019"
March 2, 2019

Queer High Femme. Leather babygirl. Bootblack.

She is a proud patched member of the San Francisco girls of Leather, Bay Area raised, total cutie-pie with curves for days. And don’t forget those femme flags: hunter green, tan, and floral on the Right.

She has been getting her hand’s dirty as a bootblack in the community since 2013. She started her training with Scout the Bootblack and is currently being mentored under Ms. V. With an attention to detail and grease under her nails, nothing phases this Bootblack.
Diversity Corner
"A Moment for Women on the stage at LAW"
Allison Boots won the crowd with a story of her own...


"It’s a slightly foggy day on the patio of the San Francisco Eagle at a Sunday afternoon Beer Bust. The bar is packed men and I’m in my element working at the the bootblack stand.  I have in my chair a regular client of mine who frequently visits the bar when he knows I’m blacking to get his massive men’s size 12 boots cared for. We laugh that he ought to tip me double for the amount of product that I have to use to cover his boots as I apply polish left to right.

It’s in this moment of bliss that a man in the crowd loudly pronounces so that everyone would be sure to hear him that he would “never let a woman touch his leathers”.

And suddenly the record screeched to an abrupt halt. The men in the bar turned to look at the two of us and I froze. Up until that moment I never doubted that I belonged. I suddenly felt like an intruder where I once felt like home. I didn’t know what to do or what to say.

That’s when my client stood up out of the Bootblack chair and all six feet of him got down on his knees in front of me and he asked me if I would black his harness for him.

Let’s say something for the record that I didn’t get to say then to that man in the crowd.

Women belong in the bootblack stand.
Women belong in the Leather community.
Women belong wherever we damn well please.

And to our allies who know this deep in your hearts. Sometimes allyship is big actions and a huge undertaking. And sometimes allyship is about those small moments. So when the time is right don’t be afraid to make a big stand. And when the time is right don’t be afraid to take a knee."

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Allison Boots, Ms. San Francisco Bootblack 2019
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February Program Report
"In the Beginning: First Steps in M/s"
Presented by Marilyn and Rio

The Exiles welcomed our own Marilyn and Rio to present on the topic of M/s, Master/slave relationships The two came to share their many years of experience in power exchange with the group and to talk specifically about that beginnings of M/s for those who were new and interested in the dynamic and for those who wanted to reflect on the fundamentals of the structure.

Marilyn and Rio were quick to explain that the way that they live in a dynamic was not the one true way, and that anything that they had to share was their own personal experience, and nothing more.  As they continued to explain this, they illustrated to the audience that M/s was always a personal thing, and that the communication of the M/s community with itself revolved around sharing subjective experiences in the pursuit of personal answers.  There is not a technique to master in the right way, or a motif which is more correct.  The beginning of M/s, and perhaps the end of M/s, is nothing more than what works for the individuals involved.

The two presenters worked with the audience, developing ideas about M/s together with crowd.  Together, the motivations and pursuits of M/s were talked about.  The presenters asked, "Why do M/s?" and then collaborated to discover ideas such as "structure," "ownership," and "growth."  None of these were elevated above the others, but together they developed an image for the beginnings of M/s.

This let Marilyn and Rio to talk about the strategies for communication when attempting an authority exchange.  They discussed boundaries.  "What do I get/lose control over?"  They talked about principles, and discussed obedience, transparency, patience, accountability trust, and respect.  They talked about the hierarchy of needs and the elevation of importance of what the master wants over what the slave does (but not necessarily what they need over the needs of slave!)

Then the presenters began to talk about formalization that occurs when building a structure between people.  Contracts, protocols, rituals, and collars were all discussed to illustrate the ways that people seek to build a strong foundation for a dynamic between themselves. These topics provided an overview for the kind of strategies that people might use to take their inspirations and desires and mold them into a method for cooperation.  In this way, the audience got to see a hint at where and how they might take the wants and needs that they had.
The Back Pages
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-The 10% Program-
The 10% Program gives members of The Exiles a discount on goods and services from vendors and members of the kink/BDSM/leather communities.  Members of the Exiles who show their membership cards will be able to get 5 to 10% discounts at our partners
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From the Editor
Thank you for reading this new version of "The Lunatic Fringe."  Some kind of redevelopment was overdue, but it needs to be said that this new presentation is not yet finished.  In the future, some new features are hoped for, such as an active table of contents, and some layout changes will be needed as feedback is received.

Among the difficulties in pushing out a new design is with mobile devices.  It simply isn't possible to test on all devices beforehand.
As I find out more about how the newsletter is being received, I'll develop changes.  Thus, your feedback is greatly appreciated.  I cannot make this newsletter a more readable, useful part of The Exiles' mission without the support of feedback.  If you'd like to share feedback, please email me at sappho_says at outlook.com (mailto:sappho_says at outlook.com?subject=Feedback) .

Thank you for reading,
Sappho Roche
Editor-in-Interim

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Copyright © 2019 The Exiles, All rights reserved.
 You are reading The Lunatic Fringe, the official newsletter of The Exiles.  You either subscribed to this when you became a member, or you signed up for our newsletter online.  If you would like to unsubscribe, email membership at membership at theexiles.org

The Exiles is a non-profit women's education group based in San Francisco.  We are open to all women, and anyone whose gender self-identification is other than male, who are over 18, and who have a positive personal interest in BDSM.  We offer educational programs on the third Friday of every month.  The Exiles may be contacted by mail (P.O. Box 14338, San Francisco, CA 94114), via our website at https://theexiles.us10.list-manage.com/track/click?u=778a0a8addcf53c00b6dd9681&id=c8b26c9021&e=816c1f81b3 and by email at ** info at theexiles.org (mailto:info at theexiles.org?subject=Inquiry%20from%20a%20Fringe%20Reader)
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The Exiles
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